I sheepishly admit here that I have been stalking John online
for a long time till recently. Now this very bad habit of mine started as soon
as we were on a long distance relationship. When we started going around we
used to meet daily. But when we both moved to different locations, it became difficult
to talk daily, forget meeting. So I started keeping a track of his life in orkut
and facebook rather than asking him directly.
In the beginning it was just checking his scraps to know who
all he had been chatting with. Then it became a ritual where I would keep on
checking his scraps every now and then. Not to mention the times I would call
or message him to know who a particular person was. “Who is Malavika? Why is she
always commenting on your updates? Why is Rohan always tagging you in his
photos?”
Needless to say he became so annoyed with all my atrocities
that (no, he didn’t unfriend me), he deleted his profile itself.
Then Facebook saga started. Taking lessons from past (read
bitter) experiences, he didn’t add me in his friends list from the beginning
itself. And even though we had around 67 friends in common, we remained as
strangers in the FB world. But being the prick I am, each day I would pester
him to add me to his friends’ list. And after four years of pleading and
begging, voila, he sent me a friend’s request. And again my stalking pace
resurfaced.
Squabbles and tears followed. I would irritate him if anyone
takes the liberty to call him pet names. If that happens to be the opposite
sex, I would literally throw the worst fit. (Apart from being a stalker, I am
super possessive too. So pet names are reserved only for me, tats my logic) After
some days I realized that I am not mature enough to take things in a proper
way. So I myself unfriend him.
But everything changed in a jiffy once we started living
together. I realized his world actually revolves around me. That unlike my
presumptions, I am the center of his universe. And it made me realize what a
fool I had been. His FB account is always open and I don’t even feel a need to
stalk. He showed the meaning of transparency in a relationship. There was
nothing in his life that I didn’t know. And he taught me this in the right way.
Had he shouted or lost his temper over my deeds, I wouldn’t have learned this at
all. But instead he showed me how to be open and love unconditionally. I am
admitting this first time, yes, I have conquered the stalker in me.
- Jane Doe
- Jane Doe
P.S. I am there in his friends’ list now. And the funny part
is that we both don’t even have enough time for each other and that we barely log in to FB these days.
